Wednesday, July 21, 2010

News at 10...

This just in...

An American got a job today and it was so rare that scientists were called in to give the phenomenon a name. After considering "New Worker" and "Employed Person," they decided upon the phrase "Person Who Uses Their Hands To Actual Make a Product Sold in America."

An American, with long-time employment service, got a job offer today in the USDA, but only after getting fired by people who panicked and over-reacted to an edited film clip by a biased weasel of a conservative blogger who was deceptive for the sake of a darned political agenda. (Hey, wait a minute, this actually happened to Shirley Sherrod this week. It just seems too ridiculous to be true.)

The Republicans in Congress finally approved extending unemployment benefits to jobless Americans after saying they had balked because, besides the fact that they had jobs and didn't have to worry about unemployment personally--at least, until election time--they think the budget should be balanced...finally and suddenly. (Note of truth to suddenly concerned Republicans as well as Democrats: The War in Afghanistan costs $5.5 billion per month.)

Sarah Palin recently used the words "mama grizzlies" to describe tough women in politics. She considered other animals references, but "black widow spiders" kill their mates, "female elephant seals" live in harems and get trampled by larger blubbery males, and "large bovines" are sent to slaughter for their meat.

Sarah Palin "refutiated" the dictionary today.

Actor Mel Gibson ranted and raved, belittled and used profanity and racial slurs again. This time to the pizza delivery guy after the pizza parlor failed to put pepperoni on his pizza.

Rahm Emmanuel, Obama's White House Chief of Staff, accepted the "The Disastrous Wizard of Oz Power Behind the Curtain" award. The previous recipient during the Bush Administration was Vice President Dick Cheney.

The film "The Crazies" came out in DVD form this past month. But the title is misleading and it is not a documentary about the national Tea Party rallies.

Electrolytes are burning out all across the humid Midwest and South.

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