Thursday, January 20, 2011

News at 10...

This just in...

There's an old theatrical saying about "break a leg," which is supposed to be a statement of good luck. But if you see any actors who actually have real broken legs, then they were probably in the Broadway play "Spiderman."

The art and conspiracy theory world was abuzz recently over the possible mystery of tiny letters painted in the eyes of "Mona Lisa." That's nothing. There is also a profane word in her nostril. Michelangelo was mad that day, after having gotten a bill for paint spilled on the Sistine Chapel's floor.

In a related Michelangelo story, scholars and nudists have determined that the guy who modeled for the "Statue of David" obviously had to pose in a very, very cold art studio.

The monthly weep index indicates that Speaker of the House John Boehner has only cried in public five times so far this month.

Facebook apparently doesn't have enough personal data about its millions of users. New profiles will include the question: Has anyone ever called you a "mammal"?

Chinese leader Hu visited the White House this week. Who? Hu. That's what I'm asking...Who? Hu. It is Hu. That's what I'm asking. Who is it? Hu. Who is what I and Abbott and Costello are asking?!!!!

Speaking of oppressive governments, dictators everywhere are complaining about WikiLeaks, Twitter, and YouTube. Said the former iron-fisted dictator of Tunisia who fled to Saudi Arabia, "Information sucks!"

Sarah Palin was back in the media spotlight, with homemade videos, making badly conceived and ignorant historical and word references. This time, it was for "Jim Crow," "dogma," and "fairy floss." Said a Palin spokesperson, "Sarah was referring to an Alaskan neighbor named Jim. She knows that there are papa dogs, too. And, of course, she knows that fairy floss refers to cotton candy. She has eaten cotton candy. She likes cotton candy."

Some guys love their guns so much that the NRA is now proposing guns with wider barrels. Well, at least a little bit wider. For the guys who not only love their guns but also want to have sex with them. !!!!

A woman who was texting and not looking where she was going fell into a water fountain at a mall. While under the water, she quickly wrote to a friend, "I M wet. 2 much H2O!"

One day last week, no students had to be told to put away their cell phones and text messaging devices. One more miracle and a Mass Communication professor may qualify for sainthood.

Joe Lieberman, Independent senator from Connecticut, announced he wouldn't run for re-election. But he would be willing to accept the vice presidential position if Senator John McCain or former Vice President Al Gore ever run for president again.

The editor of the Sage Street blog has come to the conclusion that gun laws should be stricter and that no crazy person should be able to get a gun. And for those people who think crazy people should have the right to guns or who believe in the ridiculousness of lenient gun laws, then those people are crazy, too, and they shouldn't have guns either.

Researchers say they will be able to clone a wooly mammoth in six years. In six years and one month, a wooly mammoth will be displayed in a Las Vegas casino. Tickets are now on sale.

Don't miss this week's episode of the TV show "Stars Chasing Squirrels." There is an amazing moment when radio commentator Rush Limbaugh climbs up three branches.

Three items, when mixed, that cause heartburn, irritation, and stupidity: Tea, baloney, and Rush Limburger cheese.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Thoughts about the Tucson tragedy...

It has been a week now since the terrible shootings in Tucson, Arizona, when a single shooter killed six people, including a 9-year-old girl, and wounded 14 others, including Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords. Here are a few observations...

One of the quotes about the young girl named Christina Taylor Green, who was starting to show an interest in politics and public service, from President Barack Obama's speech on Jan. 12 at a memorial service in Tucson following the tragedy: "We should do everything we can to make sure that this country lives up to the expectations of our children."

Sarah Palin provided a defensive and idiotic (again) moment when she talked about "blood libel" after being chastised for having a "crosshairs" map on her website, which included a "targeting" of Gabrielle Giffords' district in the past election. When Giffords had earlier criticized the "crosshairs" map, Palin flippantly shrugged it off and continued to speak in gun language as though she thought it was cute. After the tragedy, Palin's website removed the map. While Palin isn't to blame for the actual shooting, her map could have influenced crazy people with guns and it does point to Palin's lack of good sense, wisdom, and intelligence. She didn't have the vision to see that the vitriol of her map and rhetoric could be detrimental to American society and might come back to haunt her. I think that says a lot about the unworthiness of her leadership qualities.

The thinking of some gun owners is quite ridiculous. Some gun owners say that if other people, also with concealed guns, had been there, they could have shot the shooter before he fired 30 bullets in just seconds. Well, there was a man with a concealed gun who came out of the Safeway Store near the time of the shooting and he ran to the scene, but thought that one of the heroes who taken the shooter down was the culprit. He said that if he'd used his gun immediately, he might have shot the wrong person. !!!!

Americans shouldn't have to carry around a gun in order to be safe in this country. That would turn a good country into a chaotic one like Somalia or other Third World countries where every person is armed. Who wants to live like that or in a place like that?!

There is definitely a need for stricter gun laws. The Assault Weapons Ban should never have been allowed to expire by Congress. Yes, I know. Outlawing guns won't work as there are too many around and it is a right for good citizens to possess a gun. But if stricter laws and more procedural steps keep even one more tragedy from happening, then it is worth it and Americans should get reasonable and be glad that guns and violence are better controlled and reduced.

It has been interesting to see the Tucson locations in the recent news coverage. I went to the University of Arizona as a college student. I worked in the late evenings, sometimes from about 9 p.m. to midnight, in the library and copy center at the University of Arizona Medical Center, where Congresswoman Giffords was taken and has been receiving care. One time, for about 30 minutes, I got stranded in the library's elevator when it misfunctioned and stopped. I think I finally had to use an emergency phone in the elevator box to call for help. The only other student at the library's front desk wondered where I'd been after the elevator finally came back into service. Another time, in walking to my apartment several blocks away late one colder desert night from the Medical Center, I experienced a somewhat unnerving incident that people don't think about happening in a city. I was walking home--everyone else in homes along the streets were, of course, sleeping, for the most part--when this pack of loose dogs started following me. One of dogs even started to nip at my gloves. Eventually, the dogs went running away. But it was a bit unnerving. No, I didn't need a gun. But the presence of a loud whistle or a can of pepper spray might have made me feel a little better. Another time I was walking down a street and a little old lady called out to me for assistance. She was near her front door. She was very elderly and frail and she had stepped into a flowerbed and couldn't, without some support, lift her feet only about an inch to get back onto the sidewalk and back into her house. I helped her mainly by just holding onto her hand to steady her as she managed to gain her footing onto the sidewalk. It took a while, but neither of us were in a hurry. I will always remember the squeeze of her hand. Despite her obvious declining health, I could feel her spirit and life in that grasp. For the most part, I enjoyed being a college student in Tucson. I traveled all over town, feeling perfectly safe, in the bus system. It was a nice city and university. The people were nice as well.

I also remember visiting the McKale Center, where the recent memorial was held, when it first opened and on occasions. It was a big arena, mainly for sports though sometimes the class registration process, going from academic discipline table to table for classes, would also take place there, at the University of Arizona.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Observations, as 2011 begins...

Here are some observations for the new year, also based on the previous year...

The "R" in Republican stands for "rich."

I would have to be insane to vote for a Republican or a Tea Party candidate. Definitely, voting for them is out of the question. If I ever indicate I will, please grab a net and a taser and then get me some mental health assistance quickly.

My biggest problem this year may be trying to find some progressive candidate to support and ultimately vote for. I am not interested in voting for a centrist Democrat just to avoid the alternative of a more conservative candidate. I have done that before, and then never liked the results.

It is not surprising to me that the American economy is down. I went to Wal-Mart recently to purchase a baby gift and could find only one item in all of the large section of the baby items that was made in America. If the country doesn't make anything, then how will it be anything but an importing consumer? It's like Facebook is the new American model of business. Maybe even better as a model is Farmville. For both, people send time and time and more time creating a scrapbook profile or purchasing a fake cow and never produce anything real and substantial that anyone else would want.

If social networking ever becomes financially rewarding, some people will make millions....Well, I guess Facebook creator Mark Zuckerberg already has. But not so much for Facebook users yet. Maybe the way to make it work involves advertising. If some company that sells cheese pays a Facebook user to, for example, use the word "cheeseball" in order to entice readers into going out and buying cheeseballs, then you could start seeing notes that read: "Hey cheeseball, I cheeseball am cheeseball so cheeseball ready cheeseball for a cheeseball weekend." Hmmm. I think I have hit upon a new viral, guerrilla advertising approach.

Moment of supreme disappointment: Learning that someone has died and left you their farm. Only to find out that it is their farm on Farmville.

I have already been exercising this new year with two marathons. The Three Stooges marathon was on AMC and the "Twilight Zone" marathon was on the Syfy channel.

The bumps, falls, and mishaps of life would be a lot easier to take if they were accompanied by those Three Stooges-type sound effects.

It is a blessing if your sense of humor is greater than your sense of smell.

The unofficial person of the year 2010 could be Pat Down, the ubiquitous airport security person.