Thursday, November 24, 2011

News at 10...

This just in...

Someone finally got a job in America. Unfortunately, it was Chelsea Clinton, taking a job as a correspondent for NBC away from an actual, real, qualified journalist.

The Republican TV debate about foreign policy on CNN competed with the commercials for excitement. Newt Gingrich has become the non-Romney candidate this week. A commentator referred to Ron Paul as the "last hippie" for his anti-war and marijuana stances. Herman Cain and Blitz Wolfer were there. Michelle Bachmann had a strange look in her eyes (okay, she always has a strange look in her eyes). Gov. Perry didn't Alamo-massacre a statement, fall asleep, or forget where he was. And no pepper-spray was used. Not even on the audience.

I don't get it?! It took one brief yell in a high-tech microphone (that was supposed to drowned out other sounds) to end the campaign of Howard Dean in 2004, but look at all of the political gaffes that this year's slate of presidential candidates have gone through...and they are still going. It's enough to wear-down the Energizer bunny, but they still keep going. Gov. Perry has enough money to run until he's at least at 8 percent again. Herman Cain can't go much beyond 9-9-9. And Rick Santorum stays on the debate stage because it gets him out of the house and something to do. Wow, times have changed!

After the presidential campaign, the next stop for some of the candidates is likely the "Dancing With the Stars" TV show. Watch for Gov. Perry to square-dance, Michelle Bachmann to waltz around the stage, and, for some real eye-popping ratings, Rick Santorum as the first guy to be paired with a male dancer.

First Jenna Bush and now Chelsea Clinton, NBC has hired presidential daughters as TV personalities. The Obama daughters are also in negotiations at other networks, possibly replacing Brian Ross and Sanjay Gupta.

In the CBS "Sunday Morning" show's "Moment of Nature," presidential candidate Newt Gingrich is seen eating a donut.

You know you are getting old when you have no idea what the claim to fame is for the "Saturday Night Live" guest hosts.

Penn State University will be the setting for a new series of commercials for eye glasses called "Turn a blind eye." The series will not include shower scenes.

Modern definitions...The Paterno culture: A culture where a nation is ranked first in sports, but 17th in the world in science education.

Second definition...The Paterno culture: A culture where the highest paid federal employee is not the President ($450,000), not the Speaker of the House ($223,000), not the Senators ($174,000), certainly not the deployed soldier ($38,000) or the average senior citizen living on Social Security ($12,000), but rather is...pep band drum roll...yes, a football coach. Or three of them--the Army, Navy, and Air Force football coaches (one and probably a second making more than $1 million).

Third definition...The Paterno culture: A culture where the highest paid public employees in most, if not all states, are university football coaches.

Fourth definition...The Paterno culture: A culture where it takes five years for a reporter to request, through the Freedom of Information Act, the amount of money that the Penn State football coach makes annually.

Students engaged in recent peaceful protests at UC-Davis in California were pepper-sprayed by the police. A Fox News anchor said the pepper spray was probably diluted. No, Fox News anchors are diluted.

With all of the attention paid to pepper-spray by police on "Occupy" protestors, the Republicans in Congress are now trying to classify pepper as a vegetable for school lunch menus.

It was reported that tear gas used by the Egyptian military on pro-democracy protestors in Cairo was made in America. That's pretty amazing, because just go to a store on the Black Friday shopping day and try to find anything else made in America. How did the American tear gas industry keep from getting moved to China?

This week's episode of "Celebrities Chasing Squirrels" involves a segment of New York Mayor Bloomberg chasing the squirrels out of a park. The mayor also had his police force chase protestors out of the park. The city parks are designated for homeless people and derelicts.

Friday, November 11, 2011

11/11/11...

As this is 11/11/11, I thought I should write something profound, profane, or prophetic.


  1. "Don't be picnicking in Yellowstone Park when the volcano goes off."

  2. "The phrase 'Oh, hack it' will be obscene one day, according to the super-computerized robots."

  3. "I enjoyed living in a world where there were bees, whales, and helium."

  4. "Janet Jackson will sing again at a Super Bowl half-time."

  5. "I predict that, by 11/11/2111, every time your finger presses your nose, your brain will refresh your thoughts."

  6. "I'm sorry for the plastic bag that I threw away today." (I read that a plastic bag will stay in the environment for 1,000 years.)

  7. Humor lasts a long time.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

News at 10...

This just in...

President Obama proposed a jobs creation plan. But it may be just a bit too radical for the Republicans, as it proposes the construction of highways and schools. Said one angry Republican congressman, "That smacks of something that President Eisenhower would do." (Historical note here: Eisenhower was a Republican, but that was back when Republicans were sane.)

It was no surprise...Gov. Perry plays poker, former Gov. Romney plays "Hearts," and Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann plays "Slap Jack."

During the recent Tea Party presidential debate, the audience applauded the death penalty and letting a 30-year-old die if that person didn't have health insurance. They also applauded air pollution, global warming, child labor, chastity belts, non-regulation of rancid meat, drowning of witches, and fences with razor-wire.

At the Tea Party presidential debate, CNN's Wolf Blitzer failed to ask the "evolution" question. You know, the question that asks if the candidates reject the theory of evolution and then all the Republican candidates hold up their hands, and the rest of us then wonder if either they are lying to pander to their wacko religious base or they slept through every science class in junior high, high school, and college. Blitzer, with the first name of Wolf, was the perfect one to ask it, since all dogs come from wolves and, Wolf, that's evolution!

Regardless of evolution, wouldn't it be blasphemous to credit (or blame) God for creating poodles? !!!!

To help the ratings and draw a viewing audience, the next gathering of the Republican presidential candidates won't be on CNN, but instead will take place on the TV show "Wipe-Out." Michelle Bachmann will dodge wet sponges when she isn't dodging the truth. Rick Perry will have to sink or swim in a pool of water and uncertainty, and Mitt Romney will have to jump over a big round ball and Newt Gingrich. But there will be no tango dance number by Rick Santorum and Ron Paul, because that's another TV show concept. All of the candidates will have to plunge down a water slide.

Just because Lady Ga-Ga wears a meat dress doesn't mean Justin Timberlake can wear a beef jerky suit.

Because Congress wants to cut deficits rather than save jobs and provide services, there will now be one post office per state. Please drive to your state capital to pick up your mail.

When the United States stands virtually alone in vetoing the United Nations proposal for giving Palestine "observer status," it will be interesting to see how the U.S. suggests that Palestine return to the peace negotiations with Israel, when it hasn't solved much in 20 years. But, hey, somebody has to support Israel in this time of the so-called "Arab Spring" of developing democracies in Middle Eastern countries before Israel becomes completely irrelevant in the region. Struggling against democracies, that promote freedom, tolerance, and peace, is just not the same as struggling against dictatorships.

This season of "Dancing With Pseudo-Stars" includes the guy who was on the "Love Boat" for two episodes; the author of the book about the mystery of Obama's birth certificate; someone who once worked for Enron; and a dancing polar bear.

The popularity of Twitter is now being challenged by Cusser. Every user gets just four characters to express vulgar intent.

The next episode of "Celebrities Chasing Squirrels" involves Dick Cheney plugging his lousy book, not in the branches of government but instead in the branches of a poplar tree.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Remembering the dreadful 9/11 decade...

On the 10th anniversary of 9/11, it seems like the past 10 years, which could be called the 9/11 decade, have been rather dreadful for America.

Sept. 11, 2001 was a horrible day. I can't think of any other national moment where, as a TV viewer, I was able to watch the ongoing terrible tragedy. We were glued to the TV sets, listening as news anchors and reporters attempted to fill in the gaps of informaton, watching the smoke from one of the World Trade Center towers, then the appearance of a second large plane hitting the second tower, then the collapse of both buildings. The plane attack on the Pentagon building and the plane crash in a Pennsylvania field meant that a massive terrorism attack had been coordinated against America.

The stories of heroism and sacrifice by people ranging from the fiirefighters and other emergency response people at the sites of the attacks to those on the United flight who stormed the plane cockpit to try to end a hijacking and to thwart a diabolical plan are truly amazing and inspirational.

Of course, America had experienced moments of terrorism before, particularly the home-grown variety, with the terrorism of the KKK in the South all through at least half of the 20th century and the violent attack by a monstrous renegade on a federal building in Oklahoma City. Certainly, the attack on Pearl Harbor by the nation of Japan prior to WWII was a jarring national moment leading to war, as was the case with 9/11.

While a quick U.S. military response to dislodge and punish the Taliban government in Afghanistan for its accommodation of al Qaida bases and the Osama Bin Laden terrorists seemed appropriate, the military reach then went beyond the mission, reaching into Iraq to topple a dictator and then back into Afghanistan, to prop up a weak leader, all with the steady drumbeat of fear. Fear was the biggest winner in the 9/11 decade and was that what the terrorists wanted?

The result has been two seemingly endless wars, thousands of U.S. soldiers as well as Iraqi and Afghan civilians killed, and huge expenditures in defense spending (from the monthly billions in war expensive to the creation of the Department of Homeland Security to the massive increase in war contractors and war profiteers).

There were more problems and troubling issues over the decade, such as the hopefully short governmental embrace of torture, thanks to moronic leaders like Dick Cheney, who turned the higher moral ground of a democracy on its ear and made me, many other Americans, and the rest of the world wonder what had happened to the American conscience. There were secret prisons and the use of rendition. There was political demogaguery to exploit fears at every turn, rampant from politics to the media.

Then there have been the effects on the "homeland," a term that the Bush administration brought into the American lexicon but a term that I have always disliked as it has a "Nazi Germany" ring to it. America is my country. I care about what happens to my country, just as I care about what happens in the world.

Because of one criminal with explosives in his shoe, we all now take off our shoes at airports and go through the "naked" scanners and let the security officers bark at us and feel our bodies through our clothes, as though that's the expectation for air travel. (We have one unemployed person...No, wait...100,000 unemployed people...No, wait...1 million unemployed people...No, wait...14 million unemployed people in our country and what do we do collectively to end that problem? Is it because fear apparently isn't part of how people and politicians view unemployment?)

My fears are somewhat different from those of politicians on a debate stage. When I look out into my college classes and see the honorable ROTC students in their military fatigues, I fear for them. Will they have to go to a pitifully unstable place like Afghanistan or Iraq, and be part of what looks to be as hapless a military adventure as the Vietnam War was but longer? I fear for those students because I am not sure if American political leaders and even true military leaders command those wars or if instead the wars have become a business venture for the benefit and profits of contractors within the military industrial complex. When there are more contractors on the ground than there are soldiers...when the contractors are paid 10 times what the soldiers would get for the same work required...I seriously wonder, and dread that 9/11 has reached beyond now a decade. How long will those wars go?

Bin Laden never believed that his militia was capable of defeating the American military. The numbers and weaponry and budgets would never make it so. But he saw the American reach as similar to the old Soviet reach and hoped it would break us financially as it had done to the Soviet Union. And in 2008, he lived long enough to almost see the collapse of the American economy, probably saved from a great depression by a huge expenditure (and debt). It took nearly 10 years to find bin Laden, who was then killed. So, a person who advocated violence came to a violent end. There's a lesson for the world.

As for 9/11, there were many heroic stories that need to remembered.

Following the 9/11 tragedy, there have been some encouraging aspects. Hopefully, the American network of law enforcement is working better together for coordinated security. And I recently saw a report about how the better construction of buildings could at least prevent a towering building from collapsing. The report noted that if a plane had flown into a building like the Empire State Building, with its better foundational and cement structural support from the older days when buildings were made tougher, it would have been unlikely for the building to collapse. So, it might cost more to make stronger buildings, but, especially for skyscrapers that are at risk from planes, internal fires, earthquakes, or other problems, the safety for people is worth the expense.

As I hope nothing happens in a "terrorism" way today on the 10th anniversary of 9/11 to elevate a renewed fear and its consequences, I also hope America can escape the fears and traps of the dreadful 9/11 decade.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

News at 10...

This just in:

TV reporters are getting soaking wet and wind-blown from standing outside as Hurricane Irene arrives along the East Coast. A hurricane is a terrible event, but it really is fun to see the pretty TV people drenched by rain and trying to stand up in a mighty wind.

Rick Perry, governor of Texas who is running for president, was recently accused of doing a bad George Bush impersonation.

Presidential candidate Mitt Romney says that corporations are people. And sometimes churches are corporations. And then catsup is a vegetable. And some leather shoes are cows.

A guy from Wyoming wondered why people in hurricane paths are concerned about 50 mph winds. "It's that windy every day here," he said, walking at an angle.

An American got a job recently and President Obama took his Canadian-produced bus to go shake the guy's hand in hopes of keeping the Stock Market from dropping like a rock.

Obama's advisers said sometimes Obama has been so far to the right that he's angered his liberal base. But his advisers think that's okay and they advise him to anger more of his liberal base so that he can compromise with Republicans and produce more mediocre legislation, even if it means his base will abandon him and he ends up with only 100 votes (the votes of his advisers). But his advisers advise him that that's okay. Nothing like good advice to make a president successful.

TV reporters are getting drenched from standing outside and covering the hurricane news. Newspaper journalists, who get to stay inside because they don't have to rely on dramatic visuals on video, are dry, but still a bit windy.

If Gov. Rick Perry doesn't win the Republican nomination or the U.S. presidency, he will return home to Texas to consider becoming potentate when Texas secedes from the union.

Counseling services, like the one run by presidential candidate Michele Bachmann and her husband, came under fire recently when a straight man complained about counseling services to "cure" people from being gay. Said an angry straight man, "Why do gay people get all of the services? It's discrimination! Where are the counseling services for a person who wants cured of being straight?!"

TV reporters are still out in the hurricane weather, getting soaked by the rain. The TV ratings have been so good that some networks have decided to spray their TV reporters with water from garden hoses while they give the news, whether there's a hurricane in the area or not. The drama of a pretty person in a windy down-pour is just too darned good to limit it to just times of rain and wind.

This week's episode of "Celebrities Chasing Squirrels" includes a remarkable segment about a squirrel saved in a hurricane by a valiant, but well-drenched TV reporter.

A TV reporter during the hurricane was seen hugging a tree with his legs flopping parallel to the ground. He was advising people to stay inside because it was too rainy and windy. He said, "Some people don't have enough sense to come in from out in the rain."

Thursday, August 11, 2011

My advice about his advisers...

President Obama ought to fire all of his advisers and start over. The Clinton people and his friends from Chicago didn't do him a bit of good. He should start over, as it still might not be too late if he decides to be a real progressive, and he should look for advisers who read about FDR.

Otherwise, we need a new presidential candidate from the left (who really is from the left).

(Update: The same evening that I placed this blog entry, an Obama adviser was on TV, telling the news anchor and the audience of watching Americans that Obama has so tried to compromise with the Republicans on issues that he has even made his base unhappy. Wow, the Obama advisers are actually using the dissatisfaction from Obama's own base to promote the idea of compromise, as though any person from the right is going to vote for Obama. Newsflash: The people on the right don't give a rat's whisker about Obama's move to the middle or even to right. They aren't going to vote for him next time. Period. And if Obama doesn't keep his base and maintain his base since after all they are the ones who elected him, those goofy advisers can take him out of the oven because he's done, his goose is cooked. Wow, brain-dead advisers. Obama, for the love of the country, get rid of them and become the president you said you'd be as candidate.)

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Ralph Nader was correct...again...

Ralph Nader was right, again.

He wanted to forge a third-party alternative to the corporate Democratic Party. He put his reputation on the line, taking considerable criticism, in hopes that something from the left, like the Green Party, would have at least a say at the table of American politics.

Democrats, even the progressive ones, were slow, or completely unable, to grasp the importance of an alternative party.

Their enthusiasm about finally achieving a "liberal" candidate named Obama apparently was based on false hopes. Saddled with a lackluster and corporate two-party system, America has suffered the consequences.

And ironically, it was the outrage and action of people from the right, unhappy with the corporate Republican Party, that actually spawned results in the form of the infamous Tea Party. Though it is only a minority group, it still has power and clout within the Republican Party and thus on the national stage.

Too bad it wasn't the Green Party minority from the left having the influence.